Who are your neighbors?

Last night, I was outside in the yard with my pups when some guy walked up with his dog. The doggies all made friends and he and I started the obligatory small chat and I learned that he lives a block away from me. He was really nice and was being playful with my dogs but I noticed his eyes kept wandering to my chest area...but ignored him because he was really nice and I figured he'd be moving along shortly. On the contrary. My new overly friendly neighbor stayed 30 minutes...and not picking up on any of the hints that I was busy. Not only this, but he keeps trying to kiss Bruno on the mouth. He is turning his blind eye. Bianca won't go near him. Finally, I tell Mr. Friendly that I have to leave and nice meeting him, etc. etc. He leans over to the dogs and tells them they are so beautiful. Then he proceeds to tell me that I am "just as beautiful as my dogs" followed by him grabbing my face and kissing me. Insert shock here. Then he took my hand and said, "Hi I'm Patrick." And then he walked away. Patrick was completely drunk and It was only apparent when he kissed me. I can't stop laughing. Or crying.