Tuesday, April 29, 2008

A very small world

So most of you have heard by now about this crazy Ricin story that is making national headlines. Here's the re-cap:

Man in Vegas found in coma and authorities found he'd been exposed to lethal doses of Ricin. The only legal use for Ricin is used in conjunction with Cancer research or treatments and one of the most toxic uses to man. Anyway, authorities later linked coma guy to his cousin Tom Tholen who happens to live here in Salt Lake.
Tom Tholen is charged with lying to the authorities about the production of the Ricin. Oh yeah...and I used to date his son.

Its been about ten years since I've seen him. From what I recall, Tom did serve in the military long ago and I always laughed about his government conspiracy comments and protecting his family but I was also 20 years old. What the hell did I know? I am not saying that he made a good choice, by keeping information from the authorities but I know he is a very good man who had no intentions of ever hurting anyone. My thoughts are with you Tholens!

Wednesday, April 23, 2008

The Moment We've All Been Waiting For...

The Mission Call

19 years in the making…19 years of preparation…3 weeks of paperwork…1 day of Dr. visits and 1 hour of turn your head and cough.

Ladies and Gentleman the call has arrived! This past month has been filled with excitement with talk of my little brother’s upcoming mission call. For those that don’t know my relationship with Ryan, need to know that we are the best of friends. You should also know that I am always playing pranks on Ryan. The last time I got him, I had him convinced that he was blessed in a girls dress. For the past few weeks, I keep telling my bro he’s either going to go to the Ogden, Utah mission or the Boise, Idaho mission. He hated it. Last night, the Stake President pulled my mom aside and let her know that the call had been released and that Ryan would most likely get his call in the mail today. Do I hear opportunity screaming?!? Early this morning I got right to work in making official Church letterhead, envelope and a fake mission call. I even forged the Prophets signature.
T scribble, S scribble, M scribble. Ryan would never know otherwise.

Fast Forward to 8 pm. My parents house was packed full of family and friends awaiting the big call. My mother handed Ryan a very official looking envelope. Ryan opened and started to read aloud: “Dear Elder Bird: You are herby called to serve as a missionary for The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints. You are assigned to labor in the Burley, Idaho Mission. It is anticipated that you will serve for a period of 24 months. You should report to the Missionary Training Center in Provo Utah on Wednesday June 25, 2008." Ryan’s face was devoid of any emotion as he put the call down and looked around and then everyone started laughing and cheering for him. He was clearly not excited but trying to muster up some kind of appreciation and I’m howling the entire time. My mom told him to keep reading. He finished the paragraph about serving the Lord and then got to the next paragraph: “This is a fake mission call created by your brilliant sister Michelle who has your REAL mission call in her possession. Please remember that inflicting any kind of pain on her is not Christ Like.” The look of hope in his eyes, was priceless. I handed him his real mission call. Gulp. “Dear Elder Bird: You are herby called to serve as a missionary for The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints. You are assigned to labor in the Sierra Leone Mission. It is anticipated that you will serve for a period of 24 months. You should report to the Missionary Training Center in Ghana on Friday August 29, 2008." HUGE CHEERS!! Ryan is going to Africa, folks. Speaking English. LOL. I’m a bit nervous about this but I will save my rant for later and just be proud of Ryan. When doing his interview with the Stake President, Ryan was asked what he couldn’t live without for two years and his response was, “running water.” I laugh and laugh and laugh.

Tuesday, April 22, 2008

Ten Random Factoids about Michelle plus 2 B sides for the fans!

You may or may not know...

1. I would sell the farm for 30 seconds with Clive Owen. That man is the epitome of sexy to me. I see him and I just want to purr. My loins completely burn for him. Hurts so good! just look at him...he is teasing me.

2. I have a fake belly button. (no, really!)

3. I am a crybaby. That's right, I have been accused of crying at grocery store openings. I see a dead duck in the street, I cry. I see Pampers on sale, I cry. I fall in love...and out, I cry. You get the picture.

4. I have a VERY unhealthy relationship with food. Some might call it my alcohol. I gain and lose 25 lbs every year. At present, I'm on the gain train...that 3rd chin is coming in so nicely. I finally hired someone to help me understand how to be healthy with food and not use diets but use balance in eating and incorporating weight training...but that sure didn't stop me from downing my mothers brownies and rice krispie treats tonight. Chris Farley in Gap girls comes to mind.."LAY OFF I'M STARVING!" Ugh.

5. I met one of my best friends while dating her ex-husband and then later on dating her new husbands cousin unknowingly. Clearly neither worked out. I can't decide on who the common denominator is, me or her. Curious.

6. I have seen U2 a whopping 28 times. Yes, my experiences were worth EVERY penny spent. I have been all over the world and have had some pretty incredible experiences with the band themselves. My favorite? Definiately Bono holding my hand and singing With Or Without You to me at two (thats right baby) TWO different concerts. Washington D.C. and London. Sorry I do like to revisit that moment at times. Sure it bores the rest of you.

7. I have performed the Heimlich Manuever on someone at a wedding. This was very recently and I cried like a baby afterwords (were you really surprised?) I'm pleased to report that I was in fact able to dislodge the gum she was choking on and she was fine after a few minutes. I on the other hand was a mess. A relieved mess. The worst feeling in the world is when you think to yourself, "I can't help this person, they're about to pass out and die." I hope I never have to do it again.

8. I have really, really bad luck and really, really good luck. There's never a happy medium...it's either one extreme or the other.

9. My friends have named the world I live in 'Moshipotamia' hence the name of the blog. Weird things that happen to the common folk are my everyday.

10. There isn't a day that goes by that I don't talk to my mother and Britta.


11. I talk to my dogs Bruno & Bianca--both chocolate labs. Scary I know, but they know what I'm saying. My favorite part of the day is when I come home and they go bizerk with excitement for my hugs. I tell them I missed them and kiss their little faces.

12. I hate home ownership. It's brilliant financially, but holy cow it's too much work for one person. My poor back yard is something resembling Sanford and Son. Between school and two jobs, I feel like there aren't enough hours in the day. Ugh.